“We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are.” — Anais Nin
Since you’re reading this, I’ll assume you’re wondering how to solve the puzzle of living your life and acting as a caregiver.
It isn’t a matter of finding the right balance, as if there is some magical balance to be obtained. Caregiving requires a different perspective, a different view.
After being on this journey and reflecting on my experiences, I realized caregiving was full of opportunities to know myself, to free myself from suffering - I just needed to know what to practice.
Caregivers Journey is a spiritual approach to caregiving, rooted in Self-Inquiry, inspired by Vedanta.
12 Practices of the Journey
The Objective Caregiver Focuses on Self-Inquiry
The Objective Caregiver recognizes that the path to understanding their reactions to caregiving is through their feelings.
The Objective Caregiver Sees Facts, Not Fictions
4. The Objective Caregiver accepts that there is order in the universe. What appears before them is not an accident, a detour, or an interruption. It is their path.
5. The Objective Caregiver holds a loving but dispassionate attitude—not binding themselves to people, places, and objects.
6. The Objective Caregiver practices steadiness throughout caregiving, remaining grounded from beginning to end, regardless of what is presented.
7. The Objective Caregiver adopts an accommodative attitude, responding to behaviors with understanding, embracing the person as a whole, rather than reacting to a behavior.
8. The Objective Caregiver commits to non-harming in thought, word, attitude, and action, recognizing that even subtle harm—through impatience, blame, or resentment—can have a negative impact not only on the person in your care but more so on yourself.
9. The Objective Caregiver recognizes that the person in their care has their journey, distinct from yours. You have always been walking your separate paths together.
10. The Objective Caregiver seeks guidance, connection, and community along the way.
11. The Objective Caregiver seeks a quiet mind, responding calmly to situations, not mindlessly reacting.
12. The Objective Caregiver accepts that most of life is beyond their understanding and control.
“Tony, I’m very, very grateful for your generous sharing and for holding the space for all of us to experience this Caregivers Journey. It’s been so special to be a part of this group. I treasure what I’m learning. Thank you so much.”
— Patricia, Workshop Participant